At the start of the school year I got together with one of Little Man's friend's mom and we decided to have playdates at each other's homes every week. One, it would help give us a day with some extra time to get errands done without having to worry about picking up our kids by the designated time. Two, it was nice for the boys to have more time to socialize and develop. Plus it was just nice to have a friend for both of us. Anyway, our little group of two soon became a group of three. The third mom and her child were more than welcome to our group. The boys all played well together and the moms all got along well. It was a happy little play group. Until I made the mistake of inviting The Bitch.
The Bitch, she has no name since all I can think of when I see her is Bitch, is a single mom. She and her husband had divorced, and supposedly it was a quick divorce with a long drawn out custody battle. They were originally from CA and moved to NY. Than, supposedly, he cheated on her so she took their son and fled back to CA without telling him. Umm, that's kidnapping. But that's just my opinion. She is somewhat fucked up since she than flew back to NY and tried to reconcile with him. But when she found out he had gotten his girlfriend pregnant, she flew back to CA and her family. It's a whole big drama, which I've heard her side. But after my interactions with her, I'm starting to doubt her side of the story. I'm sure she wasn't as innocent as she makes herself out to be. And I'll tell you why.
During the first two or three months of school, her son would follow Little Man and his friends all around the playground. Let's call this boy Eugene for simplicity. Anyway, no one wanted to play with Eugene. He was at least a year younger than the playgroup boys and he was a little immature. So I felt bad one day and invited The Bitch and Eugene over for the playdate I was hosting. They both came over and The Bitch basically told me her sob story. How she's an attorney who works from her, but she was living with her parents about 30 minutes outside of Satellite Village and it was so hard having to drive back and forth especially when she had meetings in downtown LA. So I volunteered to take him if she had meetings, so she didn't have to worry about him. So she jumped on the offer and I felt good about myself. Plus she was bemoaning the fact that all the moms here were standoffish and it was so hard to make friends. Since she had lived in NY I felt a connection to her. That was my first mistake, because living in NY for 6 years does not make you a true NYer, or even an honorary one. She was just a poser, and I learned soon enough.
Anyway, I agreed to take him the following week. So that week came and I picked up all the boys, four in total, and watched them until 4 pm which was the designated pick up time. Anyway, when The Bitch showed up, I asked her how her day was. I thought she had a meeting in downtown LA. Instead she tells me she had a productive day. She went to the gym and Costco. Umm, I thought you needed help on the days you had work meetings. Not shopping and gym days. But soon after she somehow inserted herself into our playgroup. One mom had Mondays, I had Tuesdays, another a Wednesdays, but The Bitch couldn't host because she lived so far away. So for about two months she was getting 12 days of day care without putting anything into our group. Finally she moved into her own place. Well, it was her parent's rental investment property and she said she would start hosting playdates. Well, it turns out only one Thursday a month, because Eugene has to go to San Francisco to see his father three weekends out of the month. But she still was sending him to all our houses for playdates. I think that's a pretty sweet deal for her, 12 days of day care for one day. And it turned out Little Man couldn't go on Thursdays because he started baseball, and practices were Thursday afternoons.
Meanwhile, another kid and his mom tried to muscle in, and I had the unfortunate pleasure of hosting 5 boys at my house one day. It also happened to be the day we were getting new windows installed throughout the entire house. I thought I was going to lose it, and decided I couldn't take so many boys anymore. So I spoke to the original play group mom and we decided to take a break and ask all the moms who would take which day and how many days they would send their boys out to other homes for playdates. The Bitch came out and said she could only host one day a month, and that Eugene can go to every one's homes. No shame! You still want all this free daycare and you can only contribute ONE DAY A MONTH?!?!? Hello??? Are you that greedy? So I said I can only have three boys, and since Little Man can't go on Thursdays, that I wouldn't take Eugene since that seemed fair.
Well, after that incident (which was around February), The Bitch has stopped talking to me or acknowledging me. Which is fine with me, because now I know what kind of user she is. And I felt like the biggest sucker believing her tale of woe and loneliness, of difficulty meeting mom friends, or setting up playdates. Because you don't make an effort, you just insinuate yourself into a group and than take advantage of all the other moms. No one wants to be mean and call you out for being a user, so they just suck it up and take Eugene every week. Than one day, after I pick up Little Man from a playdate, he asks me why I don't like Eugene. That's a strange question, so I ask him why he's asking me that. Turns out Eugene told Little Man that the reason why Eugene can't come to Little Man's house to play anymore is because I don't like him. Not because there were too many kids. Not because it doesn't make sense to host someone when Little Man can't be part of the exchange. And to top it off, The Bitch told Eugene I didn't like him. What kind of mother tells her child that someone doesn't like them? To purposefully crush their self esteem. To make them feel bad about themselves? Well, The Bitch does. She obviously doesn't think very much of Eugene if she purposefully lies to him about the situation and says something to hurt his feelings. Thinking that it will explain why he doesn't go to Little Man's house anymore. She just didn't own up to the fact that she was taking advantage of all of us.
So I had to sit down and explain to Little Man that I never said I didn't like Eugene. That obviously The Bitch (I don't call her that to Little Man, I'm not that snarky) has a problem with me and it was very unfair of her to bring Eugene and Little Man into her issues. That she lied about me and that was a very nasty thing to say, especially to her own child. That Eugene couldn't come to out house because there were too many kids. Abut after hearing about what The Bitch said, Eugene will never come to our house again because I refuse to have anything to do with a mom who lies about me and says nasty things like that.
So the next day at school, this I heard from the snarkiest friend I have in Satellite Village, that Little Man and Eugene were walking together. Little Man turns to Eugene and says, "You can never come over to my house because your mom says nasty things about my mom". The Bitch was there and immediately pulled Eugene away from Little Man. I felt glad, because now she knows that I know she lied about me and talks trash about me to her son. That in and of itself is just ridiculous. Who talks trash about another mom to a 4 year old? Yes, Eugene is still 4. And she going to send him to kindergarten with the rest of the boys. This kid still pees all over the toilet seat and the floor. He doesn't wash his hands after he pees. He walks in the middle of the street. He yells and hits The Bitch. He doesn't understand the concept of personal space. He likes to yell and push. And he's basically like a mini rabid dog. But The Bitch doesn't discipline him at all. There are a bunch of us who talk about his horrible behavior, and are amazed that she doesn't do anything at all. But that's really not my concern. As long as Little Man doesn't pick up him bad behavior, I could care less if Eugene kicks and hits The Bitch. She obviously deserves it for being a mean and callous mother.
Which brings me back to me idea that maybe she isn't as innocent as she painted herself to be with her divorce and custody battle. If she obviously had no qualms lying to her child, who knows what she did to her husband. Maybe she drove him to cheat. Maybe she cheated and he retaliated. Maybe she's just cold and crazy at home so he was forced to seek someone else. All I know is she is fucking crazy and I just hope and pray Little Man isn't in the same class as Eugene next year. I also don't know why she has to send Eugene to our school district if she still lives 20 minutes away. At least move into the district, or go to your own. And Eugene isn't a remotely sharp knife in the kitchen drawer, so I don't know why he is going to kindergarten. She should really send him to remedial or another year of preschool. But I just hope I don't have to deal with these users anymore.
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